40k Orks: Da Divershun From Da Skies (Blitza-Bommer)

Gulark laughed as the shots poured from his Blitza-Bommer down on his fellow footslogging orks. A stray shot exploded one of them and Gulark let out one of his famous “Wooops! Right place, wrong time!! …. or somefink like dat…”

Alright everyone, G asked me to contribute to this blog since I'm a bit more involved with 40k than he and the other bloggers are so that's what I'm gonna do. I figured a good way to start would be to talk about the tournament I ran last weekend.

One of the big problems I have with 40k is how static the game can be when the goals are always fixed. In 5th, kill points made up the vast majority of the games, and as a result, strong lists depended on a few high output high survivability units (Draigowing and bike-nobs were very good for this). With the shift to 6th, the idea is to have low cost, high volume scoring units to sit on the myriad objectives that rule the board. When you take troops that have a high damage output, they tend to also be costly, and you've made the choice for the other person with regards to target priority. What rules now is low cost, numerous scoring units that are minimal threats on the table. Either kill the scary things and let the troops score, or shoot the troops down and eat the return fire from the scary stuff; Damned if you do, damned it you don't.

Neither of these types of game are bad by any stretch, but they certainly lend priority to a certain type of list. In 5th, bikers and paladins brought the toughness and killyness to win. In 6th, kroot, warriors and cultists are ideal in that they are super cheap, and aren't so scary that your opponent prioritizes killing them. What I wanted for my event was a game that does not force that choice, and while I'm not completely there yet, I feel like I've gotten close.

My tournaments run 6 objectives (to avoid having a player at the advantage of placing one more than the other person), with no mysterious objectives, secondaries and a special modification to each game. At setup, each table has a deck of cards; each table has the same deck, and each card has a small effect on the game. Some cards will activate kill-points, others will turn off secondary objectives. Some of them will modify the way objectives are scored (biasing the points in favor of one player or the other) and others still have no effect on scoring, but allow for modified rules (one allows a single unit to assault coming in from reserves, and another allows the warlord and his unit to fire into Close combat). Before the start of the game, each player draws five cards, elects to keep two, and passes one to their opponent. This way, you have to consider that the other person may modify your own pre-game position rather than just trying to gain the maximum advantage you can.

The idea is that a player can bring whatever list they enjoy playing (be it a strong death star, numerous small units, minimal troops, etc) and be able to shift the games objective slightly so that they stand a chance of winning. No one is forced to bring massed scoring units if they prefer a mechanized force, because they can before the game starts, sway the objective slightly away from scoring on objectives. Because of this, a resident Nid player who isn't very known for being hard won the event and took home a nice big gift certificate.

Before I run my next one, I will be sure to share the cardset on here so that other people can give it a shot. :)


`Dave

Orks from the Sky (Arena 2012, Orks' Point of View)

Couple months ago, my boss asked me if I would join him in a team-tournament of 40k. I'm not the biggest 40k fan out there but I do have a sizable ork army and the prospect of playing a tournament with an all-ork team and my boss seemed fun so I said yes.

Preparation: The Rise of an all Flying Waaagh!!!

The Arena 2012 tournament organizers announced the categories in which you could win a prize: Best General (most victories), Best Sportsmanship (getting the highest sportsmanship grade), Best Painted (the best painted armies), Best Theme (best army theme/fluff) and Best Overall (''jack of all trade, master of none'').
Right away my boss and I looked at each other and thought the same thing: we had no chance to win 'Best General', might as well go for the ''Best Theme''.

At first I thought of an ''all flying ork army'' but that would mean I'd need to scratch-build these 'flying trukks' I always dreamed of. When I got some orks from a friend I almost decided to eschew the ''all flying'' for a regular theme and go try to paint them to high standard to instead win ''Best Painted''.
But then I don't know why, I ended up starting to build 3 Flying Battlewagons, I'm somebody impulsive.

My Boss followed-up with a diorama of an Drop-Rok (a carved out asteroid orks use to land on planets) and we started building our lists with as many Deffkoptas in it as we could fit.
I'll post our lists in the comments of this article as it's going to be long enough already.

Then my exams happened, I got distracted into painting couple of MERCS models (I regret nothing!), painting some Warmachine...and then 2 weeks before the tournament went back to preparing my army despite diablo 3 coming out.
I really thought I could have it fully painted but the sneaky battlewagons proved more challenging to finish assembling than I expected...I then spent the last week before the tournament with an average of 5 hours of sleep and the night before the tournament I went to bed for a big 35minutes of sleep as I had been painting from 5pm to 6:16am and the tournament started at 9 but I needed to meet my boss for final details.

Despite being super tired, I was quite excited as I was confident in the strenght of our theme: we had Team T-shirts, fluff written and an all-flying ork army!!

The Tournament: Dark Clouds of Orks to be Expected

Game 1: Red Gets You Killed Fasta!! (Blood Angels + Grey Knights)

When I saw our first opponents' army lists I thought to myself:<<well here comes our first (of many) loss!>> as they were playing Blood Angels with Grey Knights and were fielding some of the strongest combos in the codexes (ie: 2xDreadnought double twin-linked psyforce auto-canons). On the bright side, their army was fully painted and quite nice to the eye.
The primary objective was control of 3 objective markers. Secondary was to kill the most expensive unit in the opponent's army.
We won to go first.
The scenario also had 'Dawn of War' so we deployed only Warboss Alces-Alces (Boss on bike) and the Nobz bikers.

Our first turn on that beautiful table. All three Blorkade Runners swooping in to shoot da oomies.

Turn 3: An insane amount of tanks wiped our koptas and destroyed 2 out of the three Blorkade Runners, only ''Da MoonBusta'' survives the firepower unleashed against it.

Mephiston vs Gretchins: this fight lasted 2-3 rounds despite a desperate intervention from the remnants of a nearby boyz squad. Most gretchins were killed by the Runtherd's squighound devouring them to keep morale high against such a mighty opponent.

By turn 5-6 we had nothing left on the table and had not killed or destroyed a single model from them. Crushing Defeat!

We rolled A LOT of ''1'' when we were wounding on ''2+'' for Powerklaw attacks, Mephiston should have been dead but the Boyz Nob's Powerklaw malfunction ruined a ''kill by gretchins'' from happening.

Our opponents, despite playing a uber-competitive list (some go to tournaments to win ;)) were very friendly, patient and made for a very enjoyable game even despite the one-way annihilation. 

Lunch: Da Boyz need more squig-fuel fer da Blorkade Runners!

I think this is something to point out: through the entirety of the tournament, snacks, drinks and lunch were provided. In my gaming experience, this was THE BEST service I got. I mean: you come in in the morning and there's donuts for you.

This attention to their gamers really puts that event one cut above.

Game 2: A Shiny New Helmet For Kaptin Zugnut's Collection (Taus + Necrons)

Well I never faced the new Necrons but had a lot of experience against Taus. When I saw their list had even less stuff than ours I was certain this would be an easy victory. I couldn't be more wrong.

Primary Objective: control table quarter (in order to do so, both team members need to have a scoring unit in the same table quarter) Secondary Objective: kill points?

We did not go first and failed to seize initiative.

The scenario had a diagonal deployment.

Our Koptas on their scout move...Needless to say these fire warriors are about to disappear quickly.

Couple of turns into the game: Big Boss Alces-Alces and his nobz bikers find out how nasty the Wraith became in the new codex...But he also shows them that he's more than a match in melee too!

Close to the now-destroyed Blorkade Runner, Kaptin Zugnut shows a Necron Lord the fine art of dismemberment by powerklaw: one shiny new helmet fer da Kaptin!

Koptas are enjoying the 5 thoughness but make us regret we didn't equip them with buzzsaw.

We won because we contested their table-quarter...but also because the Runtherd succeeded his 6+ armor save in the explosion of his Blorkade Runner.

Very close victory for the Orks from the Sky.

Game 3: Enigmork in Action! (Imperial Guard x2)

Two Imperial Guard players with list almost similar, nothing particularly crazy but two Valkyrie 'Vendetta' so we could dogfight with the Blorkade Runners.

''Its gonna be an occasion ta try da Enigmork'' said Kaptin Zugnut as he looked at the impressive machine the big Mek had fitted in his Blorkade Runner, sure, it required grots to change the magnetic bands every three minutes but the occasion to yell abuse in the opponent's com-links was too much to pass for the Kaptin.

This describes perfectly the game as imperial guard will fail their morale check again and again (easily 5 times this game) and Creed will roll a double 6 on the first turn of giving orders.

The Deffkoptas decided to go ''headchoppa'' and wiped a whole squad on our 1st turn. (not shown in this picture: my deffkoptas do the same...Thats what da 'umies get for trying to burn them with flamers)

Guardsmen are a little nervous of the Nobz' proximity.

The Blorkade Runners will finally be able to shoot their Killkanons this game...to cause absolutely no damage.

Warboss Alces-Alces couldn't resist chopping off some 'oomies 'eads while the Nobz have to destroy a Leman Russ

The 'oomies fought back more than we expected and inflicted two wounds of the Boss...They failed their morale (thanks to the Enigmork) and try to run away, the boss slaughtered them.

The guardsmen operating the lascanon must have been thankful to be so high on the pyramid: the boss got shot before he could reach them.

One of our opponent laughing as the ''ugly red'' Deffkoptas enter the battlefield from a flank (these guys came in from the flank we wanted them in EVERY game, ''Ugly Red fer da Win...err or tryin' ta!'').

The valkyrie will finally get shot down (our Blorkade Runners couldn't do the job properly) explode and kill some guardsmen.

Definitely our most enjoyable game of the weekend. Enigmork (or is it Orknigma?) was a beautiful encrypting-abuse-yelling machine but despite it, our opponents seized the day with 5/4 versus 3/3 (points for primary and secondary objectives).

Thanks to them, we had a great game and good laugh!

So 2 losses and 1 win... ''What's our status boss?''

The Prizes: Da Boyz Get a Share uv Da Loot!

Finally, the moment everybody had been waiting for!

After a raffle where I won absolutely nothing (but my friend and contributor to this blog Llew won tons of things) came the awards for Best General, Best Sportsmanship, Best Painted, Best Theme (best army theme/fluff) and Best Overall.

-We did not win Best General...with our mediocre score of two crushing defeat and one minor victory and our 13 deffkoptas list we already knew it.

-We did not win Best Painted, it's without surprise that it went to Vincent Hudon...We did score very high with a 22/30 (Llew will complain that most of my guys had a lot of primer showing up but I'll just say that the Blorkade Runners blinded the judges)

-We did not win Best sportsmanship but tied for second (with a score of 16/18 thanks a lot to our opponents! We had fun too!) (Llew and my friend and co-worker Chris actually won this award)

-We did not win Best Overall.

WE WON BEST THEME!!!!

Orks from the Sky
We come in...Waaagh!!!

WAAAGH Orks from the sky!!!

I dedicate this win to Dan and Audrey, the first for having done such a beautiful diorama, basing my army, made the logo and T-shirt and the second because I cut a lot on the time spent with her in order to finish painting the Blorkade-Runners and Koptas and I strongly believe the Runtherd's miraculous 6+ armor saves were because I painted him instead of going with her to one of her friend's birthday.

Conclusion: Arena 2012 ''Orks are never beaten in battle!''

<<'Cause when we run away, it's ta come back stronger!>> (Codex Orks, GW)

From the beautiful tables (most of them were simply insanely amazing), to our great opponents, to all the little details the tournament organizers took care of, Arena was, as I said earlier, one cut above.
I started this post saying how I'm not the biggest 40k fan and I'll end it by saying that I simply can't wait for the next Arena to happen and I think it says a lot!
Thanks to Angela and Jean-François for the amazing tournament they were able to offer us!

Sekret Projekt: "Da Wing'' (Part 3)

In  Part 1  and  Part 2  I showed how to build the main ship but there was couple of details left, so for today we have:
-Building a turret (with Kinder Surprise's eggs)

-Putting the ship on an ''official GW flying base''

-raging because GW announced official ork flyers that look super sweet

-rejoicing because we're building flying ork transports and those aren't going to be official GW releases in...a long time.

Step 11: Make your kid happy!

Go buy your kid a Kinder Surprise, then eat the chocolate, give him the toy and keep the egg. (Or you can try to give him the chocolate as you will only need the egg but I'm trying to make everybody happy there!)
Cut the egg, for this project you will only need the top (the small part).

Put the top on the thicker plasticard sheet you used in part 1-2 and with a pencil go around it to create the shape you need to cut.
Cut it and glue it to the egg-top.

Now the regular orky stuff you're used to: cut in the thin plasticard a long thin rectangle and glue it aroung the bottom of the egg.
Glue a canon or weapons you want, don't put them too high as you'll want to put a little ''window'' for the gunner to see.

For the little ''window'', I'm creating them the same way I did for the rest of the spaceship.

like that!
Now I forgot to take the picture of the next step so you'll have to trust me on this:

-put a tank hatch on top.

-armor the sides of the turret by gluing between the hatch and the band of plasticard you put on the bottom rectangles and triangles.

-glue rivets on all this.

last thing for the turret: glue a little earth magnet, that will allow you to turn it, remove it, etc.

glue the other magnet on top of your ship.

Here you go! Your Blorkade Runner now has a shiny new Killkanon!

Step 12: The last one before painting

So it appears I messed up when I told you to glue the back of the ship because in order to put the ship on an official base you'll have to pin it....And you can't leave pins in empty air.
Solution to that is to put green stuff between the platform and at the very end of the beer glass (roughly center of the ship)

Here you go, the cool thing with the ship being transparent is you can see what you're doing.

GW official flying stand (ordered separately from Valkyrie kits)

drill it and put the pins in it.
Drill in the ship, so it goes in the green stuff for more stability/solidity, put two pins.

and

Step 13: 'Ere we go! 'Ere we go!

My first Blorkade Runner being painted. You'll see a lot more pictures of it soon.

Oops! You can also see the other two Blorkade Runners. Don't they look awesome? Well I gave you three tutorials to complete your own orkish flying contraption!

Stay tuned for:

-Arena Battle Report (with my contributor Llew playing the Blue guys)
-LOTS of pictures from the Arena table my boss and I have been working on (it is already awesome!)
-Pictures of Arena, Pictures of my painted orkish army.

Thanks for reading and if you post a picture of your own ''Blorkade Runner'' (made following my tutorials) I'll try to find something awesome to offer you!

Sekret Projekt: ''Da Wing'' (Part 2)

In Part 1of this saga I showed you how to build the main frame of the ''Blorkade Runners'' (noun; orkish BlitzUlk: a space to ground assault ship. Will often bristle with weapons and have a small orkish crew.), now it's time to close that beautiful spaceship...

Step 6: Get more gubbinz...

For the ship's enclosure and ramp you'll need:

Materials:

-More of the Insulation Foam 1'' Thickness...But you should have a lot left from Part 1
-1 Plasticard Tube

-1 Plasticard Rod (shaped like rivets)

-1 Sheet of Very Thin Plasticard

-More Warhammer 40k Bits

-1 Textured Plasticard Sheet

-1 Thick Plasticard Sheet (I'll give you thickness soon)

-1 Brass Rod

Tools:

-White Glue

-Super Glue

-Cutter (or exacto)

-An Old Mouspad

So almost everything you used in the 1st Part plus couple of small additions...

Time to get the Gretchins to work, its time to...

Step 7: Close Dat Ship!!

Start cutting pieces of foam that will fit inside the beer glass, these will be the crew compartment (with my beer glass, I had to cut a piece 4'' long by 1.7'' large at the top and 2.5'' large at the bottom).

Check how it fits inside the glass, you want it low so those taller ork nobs don't knock their head against the roof (you know it puts them in a real bad mood ;))

Now take the Textured Plasticard and cut it (I think 0.5'' larger on the sides)

Another picture to show better.

Ideally it should look like this. You can always cut the foam and plasticard to make sure it fits inside. (It obvious but I'm telling you.) Glue the plasticard to the foam with white glue. DO NOT GLUE THE FOAM TO THE SHIP yet.

Put one of those leftover plastic beer glasses (the same you 're using for the frame) on the thick plasticard and draw a circle using the larger end.

Cut the circle with scissors.

If it looks like this, your orks can be proud of you!

Cut a door, try and take in consideration the deck. You want the door large enough that people will be able to see the inside of your ship.

Okay, my door isn't the most symmetric but it wORKS. 

I replicated a Chimera (Warhammer 40k) door in thin plasticard, sure I could add rivets and greenstuff but I was lazy, feel free to do so.

I glued the small plastic door in the back of the ship. You might notice my deck is not horizontal...This is unacceptable! But it's okay because I didn't glue it yet (did you?).

For those who carefully read the instructions, you might have noticed that I didn't talk about gluing this deck yet and here's the reason: let's make it orky!! Glue bits of thick plasticard and random 40k bits on it, do it with an ork mentality = glue stuff laying around that orks would have. (ex: ammo, weapons, wheels, etc...)

Feel free to glue bits on the side of the glass, same with armor plates. Glue with white glue your foam deck to the ship, make sure it's aligned!

Glue, using superglue, the thick plasticard door frame to the plastic beer glass frame. Align it.

Step 8: Time to make a working ramp

Measure a plasticard tube from on side of the plasticard door frame to the other (you can scroll down a couple of pictures to get an idea), cut it into pieces, glue one of these pieces to the door.

Get the Brass rod and cut a piece long enough to fit in all three bits at the same time.

Close the ends.

Fit the door in the frame (don't glue!!), glue one end (aligning it) put the brass rod in and carefully glue the last end of the plasticard tube. All three should have the Brass Rod inside.

Step 9: It's time to do what you do best

In part 1 you got really good at putting armor plates and orkifying everything in your house with rivets...Well same here!!! Glue armor plates cut in thin plasticard and put rivets everywhere on that door, make sure nothing impedes it from opening. For an extra ''orky effect'' glue teeth made of thick plasticard to the top of the door. Add random 40k bits if you feel like it.

Tadaa! The door should work!

And you can see the inside!??! Crazy!

Step X: Pictures of my own Blorkade Runner:

Zugnut making sure the gretchins are following the mek's instructions. One of the Deffkoptas I painted this weekend couldn't resist to show its colors.

Oy Gretchins! Get back to work!!

The Blorkade Runner with the turret...

Next Episode:
-How to build these Kinder Surprise Turrets

-How to use the Valkyrie Stands for your Blorkade Runner.

Now I need to run to work or I'll be late!! Happy Building and Waaagh!!!